Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Personal Post


My new Toy... a pink Tazer!
I am a LIAR and a damn good one, not only can I give one hell of a bullshit story but at times I believe my own bullshit. I have become a Security guard, a Psychologist, a Sports Physician, A Deputy Sheriff and I even told someone I was an Electrical Engineer, now I know what you all are thinking but the truth is I am considering one of these fields and a close friend of mine recommended I take a trip to the Philippines and buy my degree. At this stage in my life what harm could it do, my only concern is that I don’t speak Tagala (well I do speak all the bad words like Balahura and Puneta) but I could bullshit my way out of that by simply saying that I had an interpreter the whole time, and that is how I learned the field. Anyways I have to think of something and I’m not sure I can cut the mustard in the Sheriffs Academy… the one and only problem is the Lie Detector Test… could I bullshit my way through that, possibly, but shit I’m getting a lil old and my joints ain't what they used to be so maybe the concern is actually in the physical testing they do…. Maybe I could go to the Philippines and by a Badge? Either way I need to do something and quick, any ideas?

UGLina vs. JayHO




And the gloves are off… WOW, I would personally like to have a shot at whooping those bitches asses my damn self. I’m a lil confused as to what my Bromance sees in these 2 fuglys, other than the obvious fake chi chi’s and boney build I don’t see the attraction… So on Monday’s episode of the Hills UGLina breaks that friendship commandment by dropping her drawers and sharing her STINKBOX with my Boyfriend… Jayho was pretty upset as any girlfriend should be…that’s why I’m upset, hurt and completely heartbroken #1 Bromance is mine or at least my imagination thinks so and #2 LC is supposed to be her homie #3 Stephanie Albino Pratt instigated this whole situation, this is just so annoying and this love triangle just might be more confusing than the Spiedi vs. Stacy thing………………………see below post for my new BFF Stacy

BFF’s


I love this bartending Bitch… she is my SLUT hero, be my friend STACY PLEEEEAAAASSSEEE!

Glen Ivy


My new favorite place… WAIT Obviously 2nd favorite place…. 1st place is still the BAR (Tequila Hopps) Where the Vodka has a never ending flow!

Loly Pop Licker finally reached the center of her tootsie Pop


"Sianara" Plastic Surgery Black Barbie… eeek you officially scurred me, is that a weeny poppin out the NoNo spot?

Will the Real Kelly Rippa Bellybutton please stand up…


Geez lady your belly needs an INNY, this is just sick stop having babies because your body is knarly!